Tag Archives: MLB

2014 World Series Matchup Power Rankings

Derek Jeter

We’re down to the 2014 Major League Baseball Season’s Final Four. Four teams have sufficiently survived both their own stupidity and the stupidity of others in order to still be playing baseball games in mid-October. Things that matter a lot in the regular season like “getting on base and not consuming outs” matter less than you might think in the postseason. More important to postseason success is whether or not a team starts hitting a plethora of random WTF dingers (I’m looking at you, Cardinals; and you, Royals, with your ∗‰∅∉ing Mike  Moustakas – what actually the hell is going on?), avoids pissing the bed on defense (not like this), and possesses a bullpen that decides to actually slam the door in the later innings (not like this)… ORRRRRR… possess a bullpen that avoids pissing the bed on defense (NOT LIKE THIS).

Derek Jeter

mattythep drives by Moustakas’s adolescent alma (Stony Point High School in Chatsworth, CA) almost every day during his commute.

Click to enlarge.
Click to enlarge.

Hallowed ground, we’re sure. Clearly, Matty Patty is touched by destiny and you are not.

This always seemed more of a sad footnote than something that was actually cool because, despite a pretty solid glove, Moustakas has largely been quite bad at producing runs in his major league career. This October, however, he’s becoming a true American Hero along the lines of George WashingtonDerek Jeter, Babe Ruth, Derek Jeter, John Wayne, Derek JeterDerek Jeter, Neil ArmstrongDerek Jeter, grilling and getting hammered, Derek Jeter, Kim Kardashian, Derek Jeter, and Kevin Bacon. Seriously, he is going bananas in pretty much every conceivable way – this catch, for example, demands a synthesis of adjectives because conventional ones might not properly capture its splendor: Rimazidicredibling? Astounrealdiculous? Sumirperlativaculous? Porn?


(Click to watch this amazing catch)

Derek Jeter

Moustakas’s enduring legacy aside, let us explore what the 2014 World Series might have in store for us. Which pairing of final combatants would make for the most compelling series? Which would (undoubtedly) sport the best narrative? And which would be most likely to cause a Fox executive to inflict severe harm to his own person? Do any of these things matter so long as we get to hear Joe Buck talk? We explore all of these facets and probably more to bring you:

Derek Jeter

SWEET NOTHINGS AND HARDBALL’S
2014 MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL
WORLD SERIES MATCHUP POWER RANKINGS

Derek Jeter

4.) Baltimore Orioles vs San Francisco Giants

3.) Baltimore Orioles vs St. Louis Cardinals

2.) Kansas City Royals vs San Francisco Giants

1.) Kansas City Royals vs St. Louis Cardinals

A.) The Real 1

 

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2014 League Championship Series Primer

I think we did a little too much LDS, so let’s take some LCS instead.

 

OK, so we probably didn’t do too much LDS. There really isn’t such a thing as too much playoff baseball (unless you are the 2002 San Francisco Giants… or the 2003 Boston Red Sox… or the 2004 New York Yankees… or the 2011 Texas Rangers… or the 2012 Cincinnati Reds… or the 2012 St. Louis Cardinals… or the 2014 Matt Williams on October 4… just to name a few who instantly come to mind), but the 2014 ALDSes provided two 3-game sweeps and the NLDSes provided two 4-game resolutions. Really, there was not a lot of LDS to be done this year.

The LCSes start today – the Kansas City Royals and Baltimore Orioles tip off in mere hours, while the Giants and Cardinals first put up their dukes on Saturday. Most brackets (including that of yours truly) are completely ablaze; seriously, my bracket got straight up nuked.

Click to enlarge
Click to enlarge

 

Beardfaceman’s bracket fared much better in the LDS round – he nailed 3 of 4 advancing teams. Sadly, the one he missed was the big cahouna – those Silly Tiggies will NOT be warpathing their way to that World Series title for which they have so long starved.

Click to enlarge
Click to enlarge

 

While it may seem disingenuous for most anyone to try to save face and “expertly” provide you with a handicap of upcoming round after such disintegration of the best laid plans. I’m going to do it anyway, giving you a quick and dirty LCS primer while taking some pains to review the relevant developments from the LDSes along the way. Feel free to go back and review the Sweet Nothings and Hardball Postseason Primer, as well. You and I both know, however, that you are the type of person that skips to the end of a well-thought-out and well-written review just to see the score. You’ve done it. I’ve done it. We will do it again. Onward.

SWEET NOTHINGS AND HARDBALL’S
2014 MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL
LEAGUE CHAMPIONSHIP PRIMER

The American League Championship Series
The National League Championship Series

 

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