2014 World Series Matchup Power Rankings

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SF_KC_WSThe darling Royals could carry pretty much any matchup to ratings success right now.  They are hot and fun to watch, playing spectacular baseball at the right time.  Since words like ‘gutsy’, ‘clutch’, and ‘grit’ are more marketable than words like ‘unsustainable’, ‘outlier’, and ‘regression’, neutral MLB fans will be rooting for Kansas City full-throat should they make the World Series.

Derek Jeter

The Giants could be slotted in very nicely as the villain here.  Buster Posey is a legitimate star, Madison Bumgarner is on his way, and Hunter Pence is always entertaining for those who haven’t actually gotten to watch him yet.  Any World Series that has the Royals in it will inevitably be billed as ‘Underdog Royals vs. The Not Royals’, but the Giants aren’t a terrible foil.

Derek Jeter

And, really, who loves cockroaches? Nobody, that’s who. It will be very easy for the nation to root for the Cinderella Royals to step on the creepy-crawly Giants with their glassy footwear. But, seriously, did you know how essential cockroaches are for the balance of an ecosystem? They do really good things while they eat rotting organic matter, allowing for the release of enriching nitrogen from said dead matter as they cockroach-fart and cockroach-poop. Maybe we all need more cockroaches in our lives, and given the choice between actual cockroaches and the San Francisco Giants, the San Francisco Giants aren’t such a bad way to go.

Derek Jeter

Quality of Ball
(On a Scale of 1-5 Joe Bucks)
4 Joe Buck
Likelihood Fox Executive Will Inflict Severe Self-Harm
(On a Scale of 1-5 Joe Bucks)

3.5 Joe Buck

Derek Jeter

 

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